Life in the Speculum World

So apparently not everyone has really caught on to what I do for a living. Case in point, I went to Austin to visit Suzette & Byron the other day and at one point Byron stops me in mid-sentence. "Hold on," he says. "Let me get this straight. You stare at coochie all day long?!" I laughed hysterically. And yes, that's pretty much exactly what I do. Because, let me tell you something. There is a lot of craziness going on down there and most girls in the world have no idea what that is. So because I LOVE to talk about that kind of stuff, that's what I do.
So far, it's been pretty stinking amazing.
The first day, I called my mom at lunch and screamed into the phone, "I LOVE MY JOB!!!"
I had taken care of 3 girls with PCOS who had been so frustrated about their weight and we had good long talks about insulin resistance and why you should eat 2 eggs a day and it was LOVELY. And I felt like I was saving the world.
The second half of the day felt like I had way too much to learn. About how to take out IUD's that don't want to come out and how to dose Clomid and WHEN to give CLOMID and WHY on earth a 22 year old feels so bloated.
And that's about how it's been since then. Half of the time I'm floating on air because I feel like I'm this sweet listening ear who can fix everything and the other half I'm either buried in one of my 7 trusty books looking up which antibiotic is best for an infected c-section wound in a breastfeeding mom or running down the hall to ask someone what possible causes for "significant free fluid" in a teenage uterus might be. (Menstrual fluid, that's what. And I ended up coming up with that one on my own.)
I've prescribed more Augmentin for ear infections than I ever thought I would. What's with pregnant women and ear infections anyways?
Just today I finally printed up some patient education sheets because I'm already bored with my sad 3 little tips on how to prevent yeast infection and UTI. I also e-mailed a naturopath 'cause I'm sick of getting asked what herbs to use for random stuff when I have no idea. I'm working on a good PCOS packet. And I'm perfecting my charting with "pertinent negatives," which I, BTW HATE. But I got called out on it yesterday. Freaking Monday. (It's good, though, actually. I'm constantly thinking of one or two questions I should have asked. This helps. Lots.)
I'm learning to not love Mondays. Or at least yesterday. Exhaustingly fun weekends=exhaustingly tired Mondays. I'm kind of becoming a morning person. Which only means that I don't usually want to cry at 7 am. I still get mad when I get tired at 9pm (and I'm sorry to all the friends who I have made fun of for that. For years.). I still love 1am. It's my favorite time of day. If I'm awake.
I run errands on my lunch break and I seem to go to work ALL THE TIME (vs 3 days a week...)
oohhh...and I have clothes. Awesome clothes. I realized early on that this year I have bought a bazillion clothes. Casual ones. Which meant I had no professional ones. Like at all. So in the course of a week, I hit up Nordstrom Rack, Kohl's, Macy's, Dillard's (awesome clearance sale), and Express (for the one place that makes pants I don't have to hem). And I got the cutest shirts and pants ever.
I hit up Shade for ivory and fawn shirts.
I went to an alterations place for basically the first time ever and got each and every pair of pants I should have had hemmed 3 years ago hemmed. They all fit awesome.
And, for my crowning professional moment, I bought Kate Spade shoes. Like turquoise ones. Turquoise ones that I spent 6 months talking myself into buying. I love them. I think the whole office has a little crush on them. And they make me feel so cool and yet so professional at the same time. heehee. Love them.