"I'm Just Going to Gilbert for awhile..."

Having always been a combination of supposed tough girl/hopeless romantic, I've never been one to cry very hard at good-byes. The idea of moving from one place to start another has always had enough of a romantic notion for me that my visions of all the exciting possibilities ahead sort of precludes any sadness I might have about not seeing my friends for a few months. Somewhere deep inside I know I'll see them again, and that the ones who have touched my life by the time I leave will somehow manage to be in my life forever. And this makes the good-byes much more manageable.
Along this line, last week I warned Bridget not to expect too many tears when she moves to Utah tomorrow. Plane tickets to Salt Lake are really not that expensive, the guys in her new ward are too hot and tempting to stay away for long, and, we know too many people getting married here for her to stay away. She needed this warning. After all, I didn't want her to think I didn't value our friendship.
And then two hours later John stopped by. After a brief stint here, he announced he was going to go to Gilbert (which is about 15 minutes away) for about an hour and a half. Without me. Before I really got to spend quality time with him. On Easter. Still, not a big deal. Really. 

But there are sometimes I'm not too proud of being a girl.  Like when a boy you kind of like a lot leaves unexpectedly, and a girl known for crying two tears at significant occasions suddenly cries 50 tears for absolutely no reason at all. And she tries to blame her hormones, but secretly wonders what emotional reservoir that flood stemmed from. 

And then there is today. 

Today Ariana Smith got engaged to Tyler Miller. Bridget, Brad, and I hid in the bushes at Desert Botanical Gardens so we could watch. And even though only Bridget got to stay to take pictures because Brad and I got kicked out by the Park Ranger, it was an incredible adrenaline rush and madly exciting to be part of such a historic event like the start of an eternal marriage. ok, gag a maggot, I know. But seriously, they are quite perfect for each other, and it was very exciting. 

Afterwards, we all had a chill-fest at my house, where we looked at proposal pictures, Sexy Young Phil serenaded us with his guitar, we ate delicious Nello's pizza, and celebrated with Blue Bell. 

After most people left, Bridget and I sat on the couches, while an exhausted John slept on a couch, and Brad figured out how to get 1500 pictures from one computer to another. 

And then Bridget put on her Phil CDs. The Phil CDs are two heart-wrenching perfectly touching albums compiled solely for the intent of squeezing as much sentiment as possible out of this moving situation. They are remarkable albums, capable of stirring up all kinds of emotions. So even when you think you are stable, these songs bring up all sorts of raw unprotected emotions- like analyzing the fact that every relationship in your life seems to be in some sort of terrifying transition and maybe you're happy and maybe you're not. And maybe you're perfectly okay but maybe just maybe you're falling apart. 

And then the night ends with two girls on a couch bawling their eyes out, quite likely for very different reasons, but still resulting in some sort of unspoken bond. 

And then you realize that no matter why you're crying, sometimes friendships are woven by words not said and hugs not given, but just times and moments somewhat like these. 

So there you go Bridget, you got your 50 tears. Just don't expect me to cry tomorrow. 

I'm not even that girly.